Fighting & listening
Just saw this great quote at Bob Sutton’s blog:
Learn how to fight as if you are right and listen as if you are wrong: It helps you develop strong opinions that are weakly held.
That is a great, great strategy. I also like another quote of his:
Indifference is as important as passion.
I guess the key is knowing what to be passionate about, what to be indifferent about … and when to switch.
7 spiritual laws of success
Tina at ThinkSimpleNow posted recently on 7 spiritual laws of success. I responded, and as I sometimes do, am cross-posting my response here …
Nice post. A couple of thoughts that struck me as I saw a few things:
“Success is the ability to fulfill your desires with effortless ease.“
- Deepak ChopraThis really strongly contrasts with John Wooden’s definition of success:
“Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best you are capable of becoming.”
Personally, I think the effortless ease part is shallow nonsense. I acknowledge that we too often needlessly complicate our lives, our relationships, and many other things … but things that are worth having are not easy. Anyone over the age of 35 who has done some hard thinking in life can attest to that. And in fact in your case it took a fairly intense study series and commitment of time, energy, and focus.
. . .
. . .One thing that I wonder about:
“Part of writing this post serves as a reminder to myself, of what’s most important: my wellbeing. … and how I need to create the time to work on me. Only when I’m well, can I be of service and help to others.”
I’m glad you added the second sentence. But what’s most important is very often NOT my own wellbeing, but the wellbeing of others or doing what is right, not just what is best for me. That’s the hard part about doing the right thing … it’s not always in your own immediate best interest.
The funny thing is that doing what is right, and putting others first at least part of the time is much more likely to result in wellbeing for yourself than an internal “me” focus.
That’s the “secret” of success … it’s a byproduct, not a goal in itself.
Selling yourself
Pickthebrain has a post on selling yourself. I can personally attest that, after getting the qualifications and knowledge you need to succeed in your chosen field, being able to “sell yourself” is the most critical part of professional success. The highlights:
- Be Sold on Yourself
- Have a Saleable Package
- Be Positive and Enthusiastic
- Be Real and Authentic
I’d have to say the most important one, though, is not there. To me, it’s that day in and day out, you have to work hard, put your best foot forward, make those around you look good, and not care (too much) about who gets the credit.
A-lister conspiracy theories and dreams of easy success
There’s an interesting conversation happening right now about the equity or insularity of the blogosphere.
(Nick Carr, Kent Newsome, Labnotes, and Chip’s Quips are covering it as well. And now, Shel Israel.)
Partly, it’s the perrennial A-lister bitch-session: why am I not in the Technorati Top 100? Partly, it’s the angst of someone who started blogging with great expectations only to find he’s talking to himself in an empty room.
In other words: why aren’t “they” listening to me? Most especially, why aren’t “they” linking to me? (”They” being the top bloggers out “there.”)
Bloggers start blogging full of piss and vinegar, ready to take on the world and win, zoom up the Technorati rankings, get links from everyone, earn $100/day from AdSense, get the (supposedly) cushy panel speaker invitations and keynotes at hotter-than-flame conferences with weird names, receive free stuff from funky companies with missing letters, eventually write the book, make a million (or ten, a million isn’t what it used to be), and ride off into the sunset. Easy, isn’t it?
Hello!?!
This is real life
This isn’t the movies. And this isn’t the crazy-stupid-brilliant flash-in-the-pan that you hear about from time to time, and wonder why you didn’t think of.
Anything worth doing is hard. Doing anything well is hard. It takes time. It takes effort. It takes talent. It takes skill.
But sorry, that’s not enough.
The L factor
Here’s the hardest part for any of us to accept: It takes luck.
We’d have it a lot easier if there was a clear-cut algorithm for success. Do X amount of work for Y number of days with Z degree of skill, and you’ll be successful.
Sorry. I wish it was true. But it’s not.
Some weird magic happens in the world.
- Some wacked-out left-field idea like Snakes on a Plane just comes out of nowhere and hits a home run.
- Some odd idea like getting people to write secrets on postcards and send them to you so you can post them on a website results in a top ten blog and a successful book.
- Some 18-year-old kid creates a piece of software that others start contributing to that turns out to be really good and amazingly popular.
- Some slightly-shady entrepreneurs take an old idea and a lousy site and sell it for over half a billion.
- Some crazy geniuses create the best hardware/software combination the market has ever seen and spend decades struggling to get to 5% market share.
- Some other crazy geniuses with duct-taped glasses buy a piece of junk software, land a distribution deal with a clueless giant, and become the most profitable company in the world.
The point
It doesn’t always make sense. In fact, it usually doesn’t. Success or failure in any venture, blogging, business, or personal, is a combination of so many factors that predicting it is virtually impossible. Ask stockbrokers.
This doesn’t mean you can’t stack the deck. It doesn’t mean hard work doesn’t pay off. It doesn’t mean that skill and intelligence and tenacity don’t make you more likely to succeed.
It just means that shit happens.
Ecclesiastes says it best:
I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favor to men of skill; but time and chance happen to them all.
A-lister conspiracy theories
It’s hard, sometimes. I know. You don’t get the link you think you should - the one you think you deserve. I’ve had it myself.
The reality is, the blogosphere is a big place. Lots happens. Conversations abound. Blogs proliferate. Attention is limited. Blogs shoot up, blogs tumble down. Enough churn occurs to make me believe that success is still possible.
But you are already more successful than you know. Think about it: there are now 52 million blogs. 52 million!
Let’s say your blog is ranked 39,756 (coincidentally, just like the one you’re reading right now.) How lucky are you?
Let’s break it down:
- If you’re in the top 5 million, you’re 1 out of 10
- If in the top 500,000, you’re 1 out of 100
- In the top 50,000, you’re 1 out of 1000
- just for fun, let’s continue …
- Top 5000? 1 out of 10,000
- Top 500? 1 out of 100,000
- And top 50? 1 out of 1,000,000
See the point? Even being in the top 100,000 is an accomplishment! (Of course, for all of us who are serious about this blogging journey, it may not be enough. It may not satisfy.)
We have to have a sense of realism. If everyone was a star, there’d be no fans. Not all of us, as Russell Crow said in Master and Commander, become the man (blogger, woman, person) we once hoped we’d be.
Maturity is the ability to see that fact without becoming bitter.
Genius is the ability to see that fact without becoming bitter - and to continue to hope, and continue to fight against the odds - and perhaps, eventually, through blood and sweat and tears, succeed.
It’s magic. Just don’t quit the day job.
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About
Sparkplug 9 is John Koetsier's blog on life, the universe, and everything,
but mostly the stuff you see big in the tags to the left.
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